The Dynamic Introvert

The Dynamic Introvert

How Do Introverts Learn to Lead?

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in IntrovertsTagged , , , , , ,

How Do Introverts Learn to Lead?   Are leaders born or can leadership be learned? This is an age old question and one that Sarah Wilson is exploring as part of her MBA research. Sarah, who lives in the UK, found my book The Dynamic Introvert online and contacted me to see if I would be interested in participating in her research. In 2012 when I began exploring the topic of leadership there wasn’t a lot research specifically devoted to introverted leaders. At that time author Jennifer Kahnweiler had published her book The Introverted Leader and authors and researchers Adam Grant, Francesca Gino and David Hofmann had published their research into the strengths of introverted leaders. Since then a handful of research projects have been written up in academic journals but none, as far as I know, have looked specifically at the question of how introverts learn to lead. Sarah is interested in the “lived experiences” of introverts and so she asked me to complete a timeline identifying the people and events that had the greatest influence on my career. And as I completed the timeline and looked back on my career there were a number of things that jumped out at me: I had a lot of really great mentors. Very early on in my career there were senior leaders who recognized the potential in me and pushed me to step into leadership positions that I wouldn’t have considered if it wasn’t for their support. I was a “lifelong learner” and took advantage of every opportunity to develop myself as a person and as a leader. Sometimes the courses were provided by my employers but more often than not I paid for them out of my own pocket because I recognized the need to develop my leadership skills. Teaching and helping others was also important to me and I took every opportunity I could to mentor and coach my colleagues as well as students and others who were interested in learning with me. So, how did I learn to lead? Like most of us I learned through a combination of experience and formal education. One of the things that stood out for me as I worked on my timeline was this. I am a humble, quiet leader and I’m happy to develop and promote others. And the fact that I was an introvert didn’t prevent others from noticing my strengths and seeing the potential in me. Over the years I was offered a number of key leadership positions including social work leader and co-leader of a geriatric medical clinic. Of course there were challenges along the way as well. Challenges that I believe other introverts face: I probably spent too much time spent thinking on my own when it may have been more beneficial to talk things through with a colleague or just move into action. I didn’t find my “voice” until I was in my 50’s and I credit Toastmasters for that. Up until then I was invisible in a lot of groups and despite having great ideas I didn’t always get them across to the people who could have helped me to develop and implement them. I asked Sarah why she had decided to focus on how introverts learn to lead for her research project. This is what she said, “I chose the subject as after reading Susan Cain’s 2012 book, Quiet I was inspired to research and learn more about how someone becomes a leader if they are an introvert.  My job role currently involves supporting the leadership team in local government and I found it interesting that mostly extroverts are appointed into senior leadership positions. “ So, as we come to the end of 2017 I’d like you to reflect on how far introverts have come since Susan Cain’s 2012 blockbuster book opened the world’s eyes to the challenges that many introverts face. And as we welcome 2018 you might want to identify your own leadership development goals or if you are in a leadership position consider how you might mentor or coach an introvert who shows potential and would appreciate you help.   Happy New Year! All the best for 2018!    

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Increase the Quiet

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in IntrovertsTagged , , , , , , , ,

  Increase the Quiet is the name of Diana Krall’s newest album. Diana is one of my favorite jazz musicians. She is a world class jazz pianist and singer and has numerous Grammy and Juno awards to her credit. And she is Canadian! I was intrigued by the title of Diana’s latest album and so decided to reflect on what it would mean if more of us could “increase the quiet” in our lives. I started by thinking about where I currently go when I want some quiet time. Usually I’m alone and more often than not I am outdoors. I live in British Columbia on the wet, west coast. Those of us who live in this part of the world love to complain about the weather, especially about the rain, but we do not want to live anywhere else. One of the things that I love most about the rain is that it amplifies the quiet. The world seems to slow down and become more thoughtful. In comparison when the sun shines the world is energized, noisy, and outwardly focused. Don’t get me wrong. I love the sunshine as much as I love the rain. The other thing about living in B.C. is that there is an abundance of breathtaking places that are peaceful and quiet. Not only do we have some of the most beautiful wilderness in the world but it is easily accessible from anywhere in the province. So, even though I live in Metro Vancouver I can be hiking on the North Shore mountains within 30 minutes of where I live or paddle boarding in English Bay within the same time period of time. What about those of you who live in a big city but don’t have ready access to nature in the same way that I do? You may be surprised at the number of quiet places available to you if you only know where to look. Recently, I came across a unique website created by Charlotte, a freelance blogger and copywriter who is “on a mission to find unusual corners of London away from the crowds.” Charlotte’s website is wonderful and she shares many peaceful places in London where people can go to “switch off”. These can be quiet coffee shops, museums, and gardens. Pretty much any place where one can go to “increase the quiet”. If you live in a big city and are looking for inspiration you’ll find lots more ideas on Charlotte’s website—examples of peaceful places that can be found in big cities around the world.   But what about you? How can you “increase the quiet” in your life?   Cheers! The Dynamic Introvert    

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Leading with Meaning and Purpose

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in Introverts, LeadershipTagged , , , , , , , ,

What does it mean to lead with meaning and purpose? How will knowing your purpose make you a better leader? How can you tap into your purpose? What exactly is purpose? Purpose, is the reason we exist! As humans we want to know what our lives are about and that our existence matters. If you are curious about how meaningful your life is you can check out the Meaning of Life Questionnaire (MLQ) and other resources at the University of Minnesota’s Lab for the Study of Meaning and Quality of Life. What is the link between meaning and purpose? For starters, if you are engaged in work that taps into your purpose, you are more likely to find your work meaningful. When I’m engaged in work that I find meaningful I notice that I feel: Happier Less stressed Confident Powerful Motivated Creative Generous Energized And I attract people who want to work with me. But what has this got to do with leadership? Everything! As an introvert, a writer and a leader I have been most interested in the link between how I live my life and the amount of energy that I have. Being a leader in today’s chaotic workplace is exhausting for many of us. In order to survive we need to have an edge and being able to tap into our personal energy source (the one that comes from living a life that has meaning) is priceless. Working on something that you find meaningful will energize you and, Help you did deep in order to complete a long and challenging change management project. Help you present a talk or facilitate a meeting (especially important for introverts who may find this aspect of work stressful). Help you ace an important job interview. In a recent webinar psychologist Michael Arloski, noted that purpose is something that we discover. Some people find their purpose early in life. Others take longer. Some unfortunate people may never find out what they are truly meant to do with their lives. Of course meaning and purpose can change over time and we can have more than one purpose. If you lead with meaning and purpose you are more likely to experience a higher sense of mental health and wellbeing and likely be a more effective leader.  

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Introverts Unite: Recognize and Celebrate Your Quiet Strengths

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in IntrovertsTagged , , , , , , , , ,

We all have them–strengths I mean. Unfortunately, introverts, especially those of us working in extroverted work environments may not value our strengths. In fact, we may focus more on our weaknesses, comparing ourselves to our more outgoing and energetic co-workers. It’s no wonder we act this way as we are encouraged from an early age to be more extroverted. This is what author Susan Cain describes as “the extrovert ideal”. She writes, “We live with a value system that I call The Extrovert Ideal—the omnipresent belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha, and comfortable in the spotlight.” Fortunately, in our fast-paced, hyper-active and unfocused world, there is a growing recognition that the strengths that introverts bring to the workplace are vital for the success of both individuals and the organizations that they work in. And as we learn to value our introverted strengths we can be role models for others. But first we may need to identify, develop, value and accept our quiet strengths. Each of us will have our own strengths but I’d like to share a few that I think are worth celebrating: Listening and engaging others which are important leadership skills Staying cool and calm under pressure Thinking first and talking later which usually leads to better decision-making Networking because we tend to listen and develop close relationships with people Sales because we listen and are able to develop relationships with a diverse group of people Conflict resolution…again because we are able to listen and allow space for others to solve their own problems So, how do we go about identifying our strengths? There are many different ways to do this depending on how much time and money we have. The cheapest may be just to ask yourself some questions and reflect on your answers: What energizes you? How can I do more of this? What do you value about who you are and what you do for others? What have you accomplished so far in life and how have you been able to this? And there are some brilliant on-line resources and tools such as the ones available from the Authentic Happiness website at the University of Pennsylvania which offers a free “short strengths survey”. Another way to identify your unique strengths is to ask other people so be prepared to listen to the positive things that people have to say about who you are and what you do best. Cheers!  

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Do You Suffer from Imposter Syndrome? You’re Not Alone!

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in IntrovertsTagged , , , , , ,

Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? Are introverts more likely to worry about how we are perceived by others? What is imposter syndrome anyway? These are some of the questions I’ve been pondering this week. The term first appeared on our radar in the 1970s. Imposter syndrome (IS) was described by Dr. Pauline R. Clance in reference to high-achieving individuals who were unable to recognize their accomplishments and had a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud”. The main symptoms appear to be anxiety or fear. Most of us feel self-doubt at some point in our careers. This is especially true when we first start out or have been recently promoted. But when this self-doubt continues for a protracted period of time it can have a negative impact on our health and our success in life. When I graduated from the University of British Columbia with my newly minted social work degree I felt like a fraud; I had virtually no experience and yet I was expected to help my clients deal with challenging life and death issues. Like many people who suffer from (IS) I felt that once I had more experience I would feel more confident. My “plan of attack” was to continually take work-related courses and work hard. But is this more of an issue for introverts? According to professor of adult education Stephen Brookfield, “introverts are less likely to admit to others that they are struggling and more likely to obsess or ruminate on their own.” On the plus side, Dr. Brookfield acknowledges that “Imposter Syndrome keeps us humble and aware of areas we need to improve on.” But aren’t most introverts already humble enough? Pamela Catapia, registered clinical counsellor agrees that there is a plus side to imposter syndrome, “If you have IS, you’re likely a caring conscientious, talented person who has both the desire and the capacity to improve the world.” Many of her clients have unrecognized or underutilized leadership skills. To summarize, it is ok to feel self-doubt and it is in fact normal. But if our self-doubt continues for a long period of time or interferes with our ability to do our work or to advance in our careers then we need to do something about it. One of the most effective methods of overcoming self-doubt is Mindfulness Meditation. According to Marian Smith, mindfulness teacher in Vancouver, self-compassion practices teach us how to: handle difficult emotions with greater ease motivate ourselves with kindness rather than criticism increase our emotional strength & resilience admit our shortcomings & forgive ourselves when needed relate wholeheartedly to others & be more authentically ourselves Mindfulness meditation is taught all over the world. If you live in the Vancouver area I highly recommend Marian Smith as a teacher.  

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Cultivating Inclusion: Help People Succeed as Themselves!

By Lesley TaylorPosted on Posted in Introverts, LeadershipTagged , , , , , , , ,

  Over the years a considerable amount has been written about creating more diverse workplaces. As I was writing The Dynamic Introvert I became aware of the fact that introverts often feel excluded, especially when it comes to leadership opportunities. Of course introverts are not the only ones who feel this way which begs the question, “how do we create workplaces and schools that are inclusive for everyone?”. Diversity is the NORM but inclusion is not. Not long ago I read an article urging readers to “start building actively inclusive environments”. This makes more sense to me than focusing on, for example, increasing the number of disabled workers, or the number of transgendered people, or the number of introverts in management/leadership positions. According to Meri Williams of Agile People in Sweden, “We must help people succeed as themselves and decrease the impact of failure and the risk of humiliation.” What a brilliant idea! But what would an actively inclusive environment look like??? “An inclusive workplace is one where all differences brought to the workplace are recognized. Where people feel valued and that their contribution is considered important.” Step-up B.C. There always seems to be one marginalized group or another or even whole groups of people who are excluded from participating fully. Diversity programs are not new and are even mandated in some places. Vancity Credit Union’s work inclusion program “aims to increase the number of employees with disabilities in the credit union’s workforce.” Often a person’s disability is obvious but not always. Sometimes we can hide who we really are in order to fit into the existing culture. Gays, lesbians and transgendered people might fit into this category. But pretending to be someone you are not can take its toll: “People perform better when they can be themselves. As much as 40% better. Much energy is spent if you have to hide who you really are or pretend to be something you are not.” Stonewall, How do we create a more inclusive workplace?  Start with a VISION of what that would look like in  your organization. Include everyone in this work. Years ago I attended an OD workshop in which the President of the White Spot Restaurant chain, which, by the way, is one of the most successful restaurants in B.C., talked about how his company had taken 3 years to create its vision and how they had tried to involve as many employees as possible during that time. One of the participants asked him what he would do differently next time around and he said, “He would provide more opportunities for people to be involved in the  process.” Here are a few more things you can do to create a more inclusive workplace: Be a learner. Be willing to challenge yourself and grow. Be inquisitive. Seek a range of perspectives. Model inclusive behaviours. Demonstrate that “none of us is as smart as all of us.” Champion the change effort. Be an active advocate for change. Speak out when necessary. Hold the organization accountable. Hold yourself and your colleagues accountable for all of the above.

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