Is Your Voice Being Heard? 5 Tips for Quiet Introverted Leaders
Introverts are often described as being quiet and shy so it should come as no surprise to readers of my blog that introverts also struggle to express themselves in meetings and other large group settings. To make things worse many of us are also prone to ungraciously blurting out what we want to say.
I believe that introverts are more likely to interrupt the flow of a conversation by blurting out their thoughts than extroverts are. And we do this because after we have spent some time thinking quietly about what is being said we want to share our ideas and because we haven’t learned how to interrupt gracefully (see below) we just blurt out what we want to say.
So what’s an introvert to do especially one who wants to share her ideas and/or develop as a leader and get recognized for her contribution?
One approach that may sound counter intuitive is learn to interrupt! That’s right! But many of us grew up believing that interrupting other people is rude.
In the March, 2018 issue of Toastmasters magazine author Karen Friedman has some tips for those of us who would like to develop our interruption skills, starting with a quote from Madeleine Albright:
“If you are going to interrupt, you have to know what you’re talking about. And you have to do it in a strong voice.”
Fortunately Friedman’s article has some suggestions for how to do this. Here are 5 notable ways to interrupt politely:
- Start by saying, “please excuse me” before you interrupt
- Highlight what the last person said and then say “What do you think if we also do this or that?”
- Look for opportunities to ask a question or to clarify what someone else has said
- Put up your hand to signal that you have something to say
- Be prepared
No. 5 is especially true at work. If you are going to a meeting or work related group try and find out as much as you can about what the main topic is going to be. This will allow you to think about what you want to say and strategize when you could interrupt most effectively. Good meeting facilitators will provide you with an agenda beforehand and if they don’t it is up to you to ask for one.
Of course it’s not always possible to “be prepared” for everything that might come up during your meetings and that is why Toastmasters is such an amazing resource for introverts. Every TM meeting involves opportunities for members to answer questions and speak extemporaneously. In other words we get to practice speaking without any advance preparation.
This part of the TM program is called Table Topics. The person in charge of Table Topics will introduce a theme and ask questions related to that theme. This is probably one of the most challenging aspects of learning how to speak in public. Fortunately it does become easier and it’s usually a lot of fun.