Want a Stronger Voice? Use Dialogue!

Through-out most of my career I struggled to speak up and find my voice at work. Not only was this frustrating but it also meant that I had to work harder to get my ideas across. Joining Toastmasters has helped but there might have been some things that I could have done differently. There are techniques that encourage everyone’s voice to be heard. One technique that has been used successfully in many organizations is dialogue.

When I first read about using dialogue back in the 1990’s the idea really resonated with me.  In hindsight I think this was because, as an introvert, I struggled to get my voice heard above the cacophony of noise in most of the meetings that I attended.

Introverts often struggle to be heard in meetings. Given our personality differences it should come as no surprise that introverts and extroverts communicate differently. Extroverts tend to talk more often, more quickly and more confidently while introverts listen more than they speak and may appear tentative and less confident.

Dialogue is an often overlooked facilitation tool that enhances learning and makes it possible for everyone to share their ideas and experiences. Dialogue is easy to learn but it takes a bit of practice to be able to use it effectively.

What is dialogue? According to the Cambridge online dictionary dialogue is a “conversation that is written for a book, play, or film”.

I’m using a somewhat different definition of dialogue in today’s blog post.

Dialogue in this sense is a type of group communication that encourages participants to slow down, be in the moment and really listen to what everyone is saying. It is often used in situations where there is conflict or as William Isaacs, author of Dialogue and the Art of Thinking Together, describes it, “dialogue is more than just the exchange of words, but rather the embrace of different points of view—literally the art of thinking together”.

Here is a list of ground rules that are typically used in a dialogue session:

• Listen and speak without judgement
• Acknowledge each speaker
• Respect differences
• Suspend your role and status
• Avoid cross-talk
• Focus on learning
• Check your assumptions

Want to change your meetings so you can “get a word in edgewise”? Introduce the use of dialogue and offer to organize the first session. If your company or group already uses dialogue on a regular basis congratulations. I would love to hear about your experience.

Here are two books that I’ve found useful:

1. On Dialogue by David Bohm published in 1996 and

2. Perspectives on Dialogue: Making Talk Developmental for Individuals and Organizations by Nancy M. Dixon also published in 1996.

And if you are an introvert you probably have an advantage when it comes to using dialogue because you are wired to slow down and listen before you speak.

What do you think?

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